The Long Road of Grief: Jim and Jean

    I used to believe that grief could be measured. That the amount of sorrow you should feel about something was some how dispensed to you and that you got less the further away you were from the epicenter of tragedy. The flaw in that system is that grief is not a controllable entity. […]

Is Your Small Group A Social Club?

This post isn’t my first about problems that I’ve seen in The Church. It probably won’t be my last. But what I have learned in the last year is that abandonment can come from the strangest places. Even your church small group. But wait? Isn’t it supposed to be a collection of friends? If not […]

For Caregivers: Childhood Trauma and Self Soothing

When I was little, I would lay in my bed and brush my hair all to one side. Like someone would if they ran their hands through my hair. When things were scary, I would hide under my bed or in my closet. If that was an option. When I wet the bed, I got […]

I Have Nothing To Show For My Life

If you ask me where I’m from, I will doubtless tell you about Northern Virginia. It is a singular place. It’s an even more singular place to grow up. In the midst of a largely transient community there is a sub culture of standbys who make their presence known by consistency and nothing more. I grew up in […]

Lack of Participation Award

Since moving to a new state, I have had to expend a lot of energy making new friends. I’ve also been trying to maintain connections with other meaningful people in my life. Turns out, I do not have the stamina. I have grown increasingly more leery toward people. I don’t trust easily anyway, but it […]

The Ubiquity of Loneliness

My last post about loneliness was met with a loud cry of solidarity. Which left me with the question: Why are so many people lonely? There are so many ways to connect. But we don’t. Not really anyway. We “like” what people are doing or we comment on how others are spending their time, but […]

Please Stop Saying You Have a “Phobia”

Phobias are a real thing. They are severe, pervasive, and debilitating. When your frontal lobe (reasoning center) shuts off because you are terrified by the prospect of whatever the stimulus is it is more than just being scared of a bug. There are things I can’t look at or talk about. Some I have no […]

Redefining My Dreams: 10 Things I’ve Let Go So That I Could Heal

  I was inspired this week by a friend, Kait, who could tell you the first, second, and third thing about struggling with chronic illness. She posted about having to give up an opportunity to study abroad in order to begin a more intensive medical regimen to push her Myasthenia Gravis into remission. She inspires me all […]

Why Christians Don’t Make Good Friends

I can’t believe how fast the week goes by! I wrote this article ages ago, but it keeps cropping up in conversation, so I thought I’d share. Trust, you and your struggles in The Church are not alone.  But we can all do better and make a way for positive change. Why Christians Don’t Make […]